Monday, February 25, 2008

Mertua VS Menantu..

It's a very common topic right?All this while it has been discussed in newspapers,magazines,television programs & even by 'ahli mesyuarat tingkap' pun.. And very quite often,i used to just listen & be a silent participant in those discussion.. Sometimes i just smile & sometimes i just talked to my own self, my inner self. To those friends who know me, they always wonder, how i do it & questioned me, how kind of life am i in? And some of them even congratulate on my 'survival' & 'endurance' this past years.. Curious huh??

Yup, i am & have been living under one roof with my in-laws for almost 6 years now.. (now u get the picture right??) Or,according to my best friends,it's not me who have been living with them,it's them (inlaws) who have been staying with us (me & Mr.Hubby). I admit tho,my life is much much different from you who stay separately with in-laws.But,i'm not on the other hand, said i'm not happy..overall.The right word is,life is more restricted & every steps must be taken with care..banyak hati nak kena jaga..dan mungkin juga diorg jugak berhempas pulas cuba nak menjaga hati aku pulak...mengingatkan hal ni,hati menjadi tenang kembali.....

I believe,none of us would say they have a witch-like mother-in-law..it's new era lah..bukan zaman cinderella lagi dah.. But,that doesn't mean,staying together with them bring no tense in our life.They did,indeed.But the most important thing,how we handle the situation..how we attend to our problems.. There are so many differences between me & my in-laws (motherinlaw,fatherinlaw,adik ipar,kakak ipar,abang ipar & biras2) in terms of giving opinions,lifestyles,house management,budibahasa,cara duduk,cara cakap,cara masak,cara layan tetamu...so many many things.. What to do,we come from a different & totally different culture, eventhough we are still from the same Malaysia..and still walk under the same sun.. To me,these differences really drove me crazy,once,in my old times when i still could not accept the differences between us.Alhamdulillah,Mr.Hubby is on my side..i mean in terms of cara2 menguruskan rumahtangga ni..(please refer to my last entry on Simple Rules in the house)..those are the examples yg aku still pening sampai sekrg!!Tapi,aku tak salahkan sesaper..dah memang nature diorg sebegitu,mungkin ada yg perilaku aku pulak yg diorg nak ubah.. Yang penting,aku tetap dgn cara aku..cara aku mengendalikan rumahtangga aku memang sebegini..lama-kelamaan mungkin Mak & yg lain-lainnya akan terikut sama...Pray is the strongest will..So,hati menjadi tenang kembali.......

Every weekend (or kdg2 selang weekend),ipar duai will come home. First brother & his wife from Rawang, second sister & her family (with 3 kids & org gaji), or dua adik2 ipar tiri yg dah ada anak sorang, or adik ipar yg belum kawen lagi dari Wangsa Maju.. Dan,the crucial part is..none of them is 'geng satu kepala' dgn aku..or with Mr.Hubby.. But then again..kebijaksanaan menangani situasi plays the important role in this matter. Aku tak ler kata aku ni bijak..tapi alhamdulillah..experiences taught me so much walaupun kekadang tersasar jugak dari landasan yg betul...hehehe.. Yang pasti,menjamu depa2 tu saban hari,saban minggu dah ku anggap sebagai satu sedekah,satu zakat adik-beradik..walaupun until now,aku tak tahu bila pulak aku nak merasa 'sedekah' diorg tuu... Tapi,again...kewarasan akal mengatakan.."mana tahu,hari ni hari orang,esok2 hari kita pulak"... So,hati menjadi tenang kembali....

Aku happy..selama 6 tahun aku di rumah ni..aku berjaya menjadi seorang pelawak..kalaupun bukan raja lawak.. Aku sedikit sebanyak berjaya turn my inlaw family from a serious one,to a more ceria.. Dan,mungkin orang terpaksa mengaku...yang akulah anak pertama yg boleh bergurau senda,berlawak sakan dgn ayah mertua aku.. It's my forever mission,to make people around me happy.. What is deep inside me..not important to them to know.If they are good enough,they will notice it themselves..tapi..ahh no worries lah.. My relationship with my motherinlaw is like best friend..we can share almost anything together..so far so good.. If i have something bothering me,dissatisfaction..i would rather stay quietly in my room..until i feel relax & ready to forgive & forget..then baru aku keluar bilik..making jokes again.. Masa kita masih panjang..ibarat kata Forrest Gump, "life is like a box of chocolate, we never knew what we will get".. Tak tahu macam mana anak menantu kita akan melayan kita pulak in the future.. Realizing this, hati menjadi tenang kembali.....

Panjang lebar jugak entry aku kali ni..but i'm too reluctant to tell you the sad part of this story.. Kalau nak citer..it will be days. To cut the story short..we have to accept.."nothing is perfect in this whole little world".. Kita salahkan orang,entah2 orang lain pun salahkan kita. Perbaiki diri,hiasi peribadi agar kita disenangi..

To Mr.Hubby..thank you so much..beyond words..for your understanding. I know this is the price i should pay for marrying 'anak emak ayah'..hehehe.. The time i married you,i already knew it comes in a package..and i have agreed that beforehand...but i'm happy..at least,this makes me lain dari yang lain... I know,Allah is with me..all the time..He will guide me,help me...

To those who are still doubtful about me staying with inlaws-you better pray for my happiness..hahahaha... And to those who believe in me, thank you.. Aku teringat satu lagu..

YOU'RE STILL THE ONE - shania twain

(When I first saw you, I saw love.
And the first time you touched me, I felt love.
And after all this time, you're still the one I love.)

Looks like we made it
Look how far we've come my baby
We mighta took the long way
We knew we'd get there someday

Bridge: They said, "I bet they'll never make it"
But just look at us holding on
We're still together still going strong

Chorus: (You're still the one) You're still the one I run to
The one that I belong to
You're the one I want for life
(You're still the one) You're still the one that I love
The only one I dream of
You're still the one I kiss good night

Ain't nothin' better
We beat the odds together
I'm glad we didn't listen
Look at what we would be missin'

I'm so glad we made it
Look how far we've come my baby

3 comments:

Hanum said...

ujie... malas cakap banyak... aku cuma nak tabik spring kat kau 1000x for your strength and patience. May Allah gives more strength in u.... Aminn...

chujie said...

Bila ko dh ckp Num,itu membuktikan yg ko tak MALAS lagi ..hehehe..
tenqiu..Insyaallah..

naqliyah said...

ujie....kagum sungguh ngan ujie nih ! keep it up girl..!

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